Doula's and your partner. Why do you need a doula? You have me!

A common problem women have while trying to decide if hiring a Doula for their birth is right for them is the reaction of their partner.

woman are often met with lots of questions and LOTS of resistance.

What is a Doula? Are we going to have a sword fight?

Why do we need to pay someone to do my job? Do you think I'm that useless?

Isn't that just something for hippies that home birth?

Is she just a wanna be midwife?

And I'm sure plenty more colourful and interesting things have been said. And hey maybe the answer is yes you are useless and I need some more help and support! But often it is more about the skills and experience a Doula can bring to the table and not a reflection on your partner at all. A good Doula is trained and knowledgeable, she has been to many births and most importantly she should be someone you connect with and are comfortable with.

I want (and so will most Doula's) the women I work with to feel supported cared for and loved and how are they going to feel that way if I push the person they have the strongest connection to away? The answer is they won't! The answer is by doing that you are taking over the birth space and taking away from that couple, from that family. Basically you can not fully support the birthing woman without also supporting her partner. They are a team she needs that love that her partner provides, he needs to be present at the birth of his baby and to witness the power of his partner.

And because we all love a good sports analogy, every good team needs a good coach! Someone to help you learn the game, navigate the rules and build you up and empower you so you can make the best choices for your team when your on the field.

So basically to all the women and men, husbands, wife's and partners if your significant other is having a baby and you are concerned about her want/need for a Doula, don't be we've got your back as much as we've got hers. And if you're still concerned contact a Doula or three or four most will offer a free interview, meet them get a feel for who they are and find a coach perfect for your team!